Living life undone

 It's been almost a week since Kaleb's last dose of chemo.... since he rang the "bell".  It's funny, I have been dreading writing this blog because when you hear the "bell" ring it is surreal, a mixed bag of emotions ... we are still processing.  We are so thankful that Kaleb was so fortunate to have the opportunity to a ring the bell that many do not.  Kaleb is still under "active treatment" for several more days. Bloodwork in London in two weeks and from there we will wait. When talking to someone on Kaleb's team, She said the mixed emotions are normal.  You see when this all started back in August, it was like we found out our son was drowning in illness.  Our medical and support teams threw Kaleb a life vest making sure he could stay afloat and get treatment.  Now that the active treatment is completed that life vest is being ripped away and we have to wait and see if Kaleb can swim again.  Waiting is hard and its scary.  3 months is a ...

 Well the title says it all... we are now in our final scheduled cycle.   To avoid any confusion a cycle is made up of 28 days.  Within those 28 days there are 4 days of chemo treatments.  Last cycle was hard and we all hit a wall.  Exhausted and worn down from everything life has thrown our way.  I am sorry I failed to update you all but we needed to take time to process and feel some of our feels.   Everything was good, no bad news we just needed a moment to pause and breathe.  My sister referenced it to running a race, there is a point where you hit a wall and all the feels come out... next thing you know you cross the finish line and all is good.  She is right ( I think... I'm not a runner by any stretch of the matter!!) the only difference is Kaleb's race will continue even after the bell is rung. Matt and I made the hard decision to keep the kids home from school.  Kaleb went onto a medical temporary leave from school.  The ph...

Well the New Year is upon us and it's been awhile since I last updated you.    Where to start?.... Matt and I kept the kids home from school as possible covid cases became positive cases at the school.  Libby and Kaleb were not all that excited to be back online (they are still supposed to be in person) but I reminded them how they did this last year and rocked it.  They could definitely handle the last week before Christmas break online and to be honest Kaleb has been doing a hybrid variation of school since September.  As for next week we still are unsure if we will send them back a lot will depend on Kaleb's counts and what the numbers are looking like.   Kaleb's hair is coming back!  For a little bit it looked like it might be blond but we can now see that it will be red. Bets on if it will be straight or curly are in the works!      We were very lucky and were able to spend Christmas at home (this is not a privilege that every child...

  This past weekend Kaleb was able to put his illness to the side for just over an hour and just be a teen hanging out with his 2 cousins (and some of the family) bowling.  We found out that Kaleb has a natural talent for bowling and he beat everyone's scores.  He was dubbed the "King Pin" after getting his 3rd strike in a single game! It was so wonderful to feel like the world was normal for a short time. Sunday we packed up and got ready to head back to London.  After giving instructions to Nana and Grandad for Libby and Locksley, we headed out making a quick stop at the McDonalds for warm drinks as the snow was starting to blow and we knew we were in for an interesting drive.  The snow started off slowly with just a bit of damp road cover, picking up to heavy snowfall and poor visibility, to blowing snow, to wet snow, to slushy snow to raining hail and finally just rain.  We saw all the weather.  After 3 hours we arrived at the hotel and checked in....

 Well we are officially half way there.  Kaleb Matt and I are in London once again for the start of cycle 4.   We were able to enjoy a full 2 weeks at home with no travel and no major concerns.  During those 2 weeks we were able to get all of us doubled vaccinated (yes even Kaleb).  Thankfully the kids did not have any big reactions... I on the other hand struggled with energy/fatigue, headaches and pain at the needle site for several days/ over a week.  Matt and I celebrated 20 years of marriage and hung curtains to mark the occasion ... lol I know so romantic!  Kaleb had visits form the VON nurse to change his PICC line bandages. We were able to pull out our Christmas decorations and get started on making our home feel more festive.  We received a few special surprise drop offs from friends and family. Kaleb and Libby both got their report cards and Kaleb was able to manage 2 full days of classes back to back before hitting a minor crash!  ...

  And we are back!     Monday was a LONG day … 9hrs long.     We arrived in London on Sunday, as we knew to expect a long appointment day on the Monday.     After checking in, we discovered that we had a room with a view of the pool and a balcony to sit on and enjoy the sounds of the waterfall!     Such a nice change from what we have had. The last few times we have had a view of the parking lot… not too exciting to look out of, so this was an unexpected and welcomed surprise!     After getting something to eat, we pulled out Uno Flip (a new card game) and had a great night laughing and enjoying some competitive banter!       Due to the time change it actually felt like we slept in!  After eating some leftovers for breakfast, we headed to the hospital.  It was crazy busy!!  Line ups of people from the hospital out the door and all the way into the parking garage. Out front (where Matt dro...

The End of Cycle 2 meant that it was time to have more tests done to see if the cancer was dying or growing and spreading.  Thursday Matt and Kaleb headed into London for the day so Kaleb could have a PET CT Scan done.  The boys decided to take the truck, as it has a working sound system and its more comfortable for Kaleb.  Once they were done hitting the tip of the antenna on every single support beam in the parking garage they made it to the roof to park.  (insert me shaking my head)  Kaleb had to fast for this test so with a grumbling hungry stomach, they headed into St Joseph's hospital where Kaleb gave the "Jesus" statue a high-five and reported to the imaging unit.  The test takes 3 hours to complete so once they were done they headed off in search of food and then headed home.  Our weekend became a waiting game and we all seemed to feel the stress of Monday(today) looming.   Sunday we headed back to London early so that we would not be dodg...